Boundaries

Boundaries Close Quarters

Ask Alison: How do I set boundaries in close quarters with others?

By Alison Cook | March 25, 2020

Question: How do I stay sane living in close quarters with other people? Answer: Here’s some universal advice that can help regardless of your situation, especially during a crisis…

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Boundaries with Anxiety

Ask Alison: How do I set boundaries with anxiety?

By Alison Cook | March 11, 2020

Question: I feel anxious all the time. My friends tell me that I just need to trust God more, but it doesn’t help. How can I stop feeling so anxious? (Patrice H.) Answer: Let’s talk boundaries with anxiety, because I understand how you feel. First of all, remember that fear is a common emotion. A...

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boundaries for women forgiveness

Ask Alison: How do I forgive and set boundaries?

By Alison Cook | March 4, 2020

Question: People keep telling me that I need to forgive the friend who hurt me. I want to forgive, but does that mean I have to pretend like nothing happened? (Julie W.) Answer: I’m so glad you asked this question. When it comes to setting boundaries for women, this issue can be very confusing. The...

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Ask Alison: Will Setting Boundaries Make Me Seem Like a B**ch?

By Alison Cook | February 26, 2020

Question: I’m nervous that setting boundaries with other people will make me seem like a b**ch. What do I do?

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Boundaries Bad Friends

Ask Alison: Boundaries with Bad Friends and How to Find New Friends

By Alison Cook | February 19, 2020

How do you set boundaries with unhealthy one-way relationships and find new healthy friends? Dr. Alison Cook answers this tough question in “Ask Alison.”

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what-every-woman-needs-to-know

What Every Woman Needs to Know about Boundaries

By Alison Cook | January 13, 2020

What if Jesus wants you to uncover the dazzling God-image that burns in your heart? What if your most important job might be to ensure that fire does not go out? If you’re like me, a part of you might think that sounds good, but another part of you might feel hesitant, thinking: doesn’t Jesus...

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the-most-important-boundary

The Most Important Boundary You Must Set

By Alison Cook | December 18, 2019

The most important boundary you must set might surprise you. It’s not the one you need to set with your kids, your toxic friend, or with your in-laws for that matter—as important as those boundaries are. The most important boundary you must set is the one that protects your most important asset. It’s the line...

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boundaries-with-mom

Why boundaries with your mom matter

By Alison Cook | July 10, 2019

“I love my mom, and I want her to be a part of my kids’ lives,” Nicole told me, during our first meeting. “But I feel so much guilt. She would spend every second with us if she could. And I feel terrible telling her no.”* Nicole felt she was abandoning her mother by setting...

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healthy-distance

Why healthy distance is so important in relationships

By Alison Cook | July 3, 2019

My mom always used to say, “some people are loved best from a distance.” I never really understood the idea of healthy distance until I started working through my own boundaries issues. As a young adult, I didn’t know how to hold others responsible for their behaviors, nor did I even think it was important....

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boundaries and heartache

Boundaries can help heal a heartache

By Alison Cook | June 17, 2019

I’ll never forget the first time I discovered that boundaries can help heal a heartache. Decades ago, I drove home a few weeks after a painful break-up. As I parked in front of my apartment, a favorite song came on the radio. Suddenly, the tears I’d been holding back for weeks came pouring out. In...

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boundaries-with-guilt

Why you should pay attention to guilt

By Alison Cook | May 29, 2019

Do you feel guilty all the time? If you do, please know you’re not alone. A constant sense of guilt is one of the most common challenging emotions I come across in people. Sometimes guilt is a subtle feeling—a nagging sense of all the things you’ve done wrong. Sometimes it’s not so subtle—a sense of...

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9 ways to set boundaries with loneliness

By Alison Cook | March 27, 2019

It takes a long time to make an old friend. I learned that the hard way in the first 2 decades of my adult life. Job changes, moves, graduate school, and my family of origin leaving the small, close-knit town of my youth left me struggling with loneliness as I navigated into adulthood. We need...

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